An abuser will exert Power and Control over their victim combined with the Cycle of Violence to keep the victim in an abusive relationships.
The Domestic Violence Power & Control wheel
was developed through The Duluth Model.
Using intimidation: making them afraid by using looks, actions, gestures, smashing things, destroying their property, abusing pets, displaying weapons.
Using emotional abuse: putting them down, making them feel bad about themselves, calling them names, making them think they are crazy, playing mind games, humiliating them, making them feel guilty.
Using isolation: controlling what they do, who they see and talk to, what they read, where they go, limiting their outside involvement, using jealousy to justify actions.
Minimizing, denying, and blaming: making light of the abuse and not taking the victim’s concerns about it seriously, saying the abuse didn't happen, shifting responsibility for abusive behavior, saying they caused it.
Using children: making them feel guilty about the children, using the children to relay messages, using visitation to harass them, threatening to take the children away.
Using male privilege: treating her like a servant, making all the big decisions, acting like the "master of the castle", being the one to define men's and women's roles.
Using economic abuse: preventing them from getting or keeping a job, making them ask for money, giving them an allowance, taking their money, not letting them know about or have access to family income.
Using coercion and threats: making and/or carrying out threats to hurt them, threatening to leave them, to commit suicide, to report them to welfare, making them drop charges, making them do illegal things.
For additional information contact the Women's Commission at 704-336-3210